Hold Me Together
by bluemoonbabe
Summary: What happens when Julian and Alexis feel like they need each other..? My take on what should have happened after Danny's cancer could have possibly returned.


Hold Me Together

A few days had passed since Danny's results had come back. His cancer had returned and no one in the family was handling it well. Sam was beyond distraught—she after all had denied that the cancer had returned and requested for the tests to be done again. However, Alexis was handling it even worse than Sam. She couldn't believe it; Danny looked as happy and healthy as ever. She had been fighting tears for days, and she finally let them flow one day while she was at the office. They came pouring down and refused to stop. Dianne tried to convince Alexis to go home that day, but Alexis refused.

When Alexis went to get coffee, she left her phone at her desk. Dianne took the opportunity to search through Alexis' contacts and found Julian's number. If anyone could convince Alexis to go home—it was Julian. Dianne knew this all too well. Alexis had a tendency to talk about him after she had imbibed enough alcohol and her feelings for him would come tumbling out. Even though they were supposedly broken up, Alexis had mentioned how much she loved the man a time or two during one of their outings to The Floating Rib after having a bit too much alcohol.

"Alexis, I never thought that you would call me," was how Julian greeted her.

"It's not Alexis; it's Dianne Miller."

"Why are you using her phone; is something wrong with Alexis?"

"Alexis is hysterical. She's been crying at the office for the past two hours and I can't convince her to go home. I thought that you might—"

"I doubt that I'm the man to convince her, considering that she denies having any feelings for me at the moment. Perhaps you should call Ned." Sheesh, the man must loathe Ned, thought Dianne.

"Cut the shit, Julian. This isn't about your relationship with her. I could care less if you and she get back together or not. Alexis needs someone right now to help her back on her feet and you're the only person in the world that I could ever imagine would be able to do so. So get your ass over here before Alexis gets worse." Dianne hung up dramatically, expecting Julian to be at the office within the next ten minutes.

Alexis failed to pick herself back up. She had fallen on her way back to her desk and the floor seemed like the perfect spot to just lay there and die. Alexis' life was a hot mess. Between the search for the man who was behind the murder of Patrick's son, avoiding Julian, refusing any feelings she felt for Julian and finding out the news about Danny's cancer returning, Alexis was grasping at straws. Everywhere she searched for comfort, for a bit of relief, she never found it. Ned's hugs and reassurances were nothing to her—they were just trivial acts of his sympathy for her.

When Julian entered the elevator at General Hospital, Alexis had felt relief spread through her body. She hoped with all her might that once she set Danny down that Julian would embrace her with his strong, secure arms, that she could bury her face in his shoulder and inhale the scent of his warm, comforting cologne. She wouldn't have rejected him if he had made that move. She needed his comfort, yearned for it, and craved it with every fiber of her being. But he stood still, watching her, his eyes saying "I want to hold you, but because you don't want me, I can't." Alexis plead with her eyes for him to comfort her, but to no avail. "I'm doing everything I can to try and pull it together, but it's getting real hard," she had said in a desperate attempt for him to bring her some solace. He put a hand on her shoulder, patting it carefully. That was all he allowed himself to do, otherwise he would succumb to the woman he loved more than his own life. Alexis took what she was given, and his hand on her shoulder had made her feel more at ease, but she wanted more. Yet, she refused to let herself make the first move—she would not allow herself to stoop so low. But dear God, she wanted to, she wanted him, needed all he could give her.

Dianne led Julian to Alexis' office, but when they opened the door they were shocked to find Alexis wallowing on the floor, playing pitifully with a piece of her hair. Julian ran to her, sitting down beside Alexis. "What's wrong, Alexis?"

"Julian," she whispered; her voice hoarse from choking back tears.

"I'm taking you home, and that's final."

"I'm fine, really, Julian. You don't need to worry about me," she muttered.

"Judging from the state you're in, I would have to disagree." Julian stood up, picked her up and carried Alexis, bridal style, out of the law firm. She didn't have the energy to fight with him.

Julian knew that it was completely unlike Alexis to break down like this, but he knew that her life was turning into smithereens. He told himself that he would take her home, hand her over to Sam and Molly and be done with this whole ordeal. He hadn't said much to Alexis in the car. He let her sit in the back seat and he would occasionally check up on her by looking into the rearview mirror. She was sobbing and fidgeting with her fingers. His heart was breaking with every passing second; if it were allowed by Alexis, he would stop the car, hop in the back seat and just hold her until the end of time. They arrived at the apartment too soon, and that took Julian's mind out of the gutter for a brief moment of time.

"I can take myself to Sam's apartment, thank you." Alexis said when Julian helped her out of the car.

"I know you can, but I'm doing this for my sake. I'll leave as soon as you get into Sam's apartment, I promise."

"You're not very good at keeping promises, Mr. Jerome."

"Well maybe I should change that." Julian put his hand in the small of Alexis' back and led her to Sam's apartment. Alexis pursed her lips and looked away from his attractive face. She adored the way the lines around his eyes curved upwards when he smiled, and she loved the shape of his nose, the lopsidedness of his upper lip. Most of all she loved the twinkle in his eyes that appeared whenever he looked at her.

Upon reaching the apartment, Alexis opened the door and called for Sam and Molly. There was no answer, but there was a note left on the inside of the door that said that they had left at noon and would be back tomorrow. Nicholas had asked for them to stay at Wyndamere for the night and they had been all too happy to oblige.

"I hate to leave you alone, but I really should keep my promise. Take care, Alexis." Julian slowly turned to leave.

Alexis hesitated. "No," she whispered beneath her breath. Julian stopped, holding his breath in. Alexis didn't think that he would have heard that. "I—I don't want you to leave."

"We really shouldn't."

"I don't care right now, Julian. I just need someone."

"Call up a friend. I'm the last person you should want to be your company." His words were forced, said monotonously. He hadn't meant a single word of it. He was waiting for the green light to go off for him to turn around, go into their daughter's apartment and never look back. What Alexis was saying wasn't enough—this was too easy.

"It's not that simple."

"But it is, Alexis." He couldn't face her, no matter how much he wanted to see her.

Alexis' bottom lip was quivering, her eyes bloodshot and watery. She looked about ten years older, completely worn down by the fight she knew she would always lose. "Turn around Julian. I want you to look me in the eyes."

He did just as he asked. "Whatever you say."

Alexis pushed the boundary by stepping forward, one step, two, three; the click of her heels emphasizing the tension in the room. Their breathing was heavy. "Julian, I need you," she uttered, her voice low and sultry. She placed her hand on his chest to see exactly how fast his heart was beating against his chest. She inched her lips closer to his. "Tell me that you need me too."

"Who's doing the seducing now, Alexis?"

Alexis refused to answer; there was no need.

Julian felt the pull to Alexis, and it was as strong as hell. He could barely control himself, and the strength that it took to control himself was making him go dizzy. "Why make me tell you for the thousandth time how much I need you, how much I want you? You're the only woman in the world for me—I've told you that time and time again."

"Mmm, then stay Julian. Stay, if you mean those words."

Their lips crashed against each other like waves against the seashore, relentless, infinite, beautiful. Alexis pulled him into the apartment, a temptress that must always have her way. Then Julian said the words that she feared he would say, because anything he did came with a price unpayable, "If you want me to stay, I'm staying more than just the night." In a way, those were the words that she had wanted to hear the most at the same time. She never wanted him to leave.

"I never said that you couldn't."

"That applies to you as well. I stay with you—you stay with me. That's the only way that this will work. You run, and I am never coming back to you. We'll be finished. This is the last time—The. Last. Time." His staccato words were sharp; each word pierced her heart.

She nodded, tears trailing down her cheeks. She bit her lip and then hesitantly opened her lips to speak, "I want to be with you," she began, "Because no matter who you work for, what your past is, I come back to you—because I love you with all my heart. When I heard about Danny's cancer returning, all I wanted was your comfort. You give me everything that no other man could give. I want you, Julian Jerome, because you're the one thing that holds me together when I feel like I'm falling apart. I love you."

"I love you too." Julian stayed with her the rest of the night, and the day after that, and the day after that—Julian and Alexis stayed together because they without the other, they were nothing.

A/N: Just a little one-shot I came up with. Hope you guys enjoyed!


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